Fondest greetings, O Best Beloveds.
After cajoling (read: bullying) my roommate into bringing my recently baked Pecan Pie Mini-Muffins to work with her, I have thus far been successful in my mission to never keep the fruits of my baking labors at home. Your insomnibaker is a success!! So successful, in fact, that tonight I’ve gone and gotten ambitious again.
So far on this blog, I’ve done Oreo Truffles and Cheesecake Truffles. The fundamental idea is simple– take a dessert, and cover it in chocolate. Clearly everyone can get behind this. To further pursue this dream of making fattening things more fattening, I was pointed in the direction of Bakerella.
This was a huge mistake. Because she is fabulous.
Her writing style and her bite-sized desserts are both sweet and unexpected. I was immediately drawn to the little
bite-size treats she makes called Cake Balls. I was interested in these for a few reasons– mostly because it allows your insomnibaker to say “balls” and giggle every few sentences.
Heheheh. Balls. Heh.
Now, this recipe requires some serious futzing with. Firstly, I had to make it gluten free, as my InsomniBoss is intolerant of both Gluten and Days Off. Secondly, I wasn’t about to use a can of cream cheese frosting– have you ever looked at the ingredients in a can of cream cheese frosting? I swear to Cthulu, it’s made of partially hydrogenated palm oil and the bones of our pagan ancestors ground up and used as preservatives. Cream cheese frosting made from scratch? Just cream cheese, butter, and sugar. I’ll just make it from scratch, thankyouverymuch.
But I know from experience that the bake-a-thing-and-make-it-into-truffles process is mighty length, so I’m starting my insomnibaking at 9ish instead of 1is. And away we go!!
- Making the gluten-free cake part of the recipe was easy. I bought a mix. I ended up choosing Namaste Gluten-Free Vanilla Cake, as it got rave reviews such as “Hey, this doesn’t suck nearly so bad as some of the other gluten-free cakes I’ve tried!”.
- I preheated (prehet?) the oven to 350 degrees, and started the laborious process of mixing the cake ingredients together.
- And two seconds later, it was done.
- In case you are wondering, I mixed together 1/2 cup vegetable oil, 3 eggs, and 1 cup water in with the cake mix and poured it in a pan.
- I got a little bit loco, and poured in the remnants of a bag of white chocolate chips I had laying around. I’m crazy I tells ya, crazy!!
- I let my crazycake bake for 22 minutes, and left a package of cream cheese and butter on top of the oven to soften.
- Once I was satisfied by the softness of the butter / cream cheese (8 tablespoons and 8 ounces, respectively), I mixed them together with 1 cup powdered sugar and one splash of vanilla extract.
- I washed my hands really thoroughly, as I was about to get messy.
- I crumbled the cooled cake (seriously, make sure it’s cooled) into the cream cheese frosting.
- That wasn’t the messy bit.
- I squished the cake and frosting together with my hands.
- Guess which bit was the messy bit?!?!?!
- No really, guess!!!!
- I rolled the cake mixture into little balls, and put them in a sheet of wax paper. I was able to make about 50, and had to double up the layers.
- (Hint: this bit was also messy)
- The cake balls, at this stage, looked pretty lackluster. That’s what I get for choosing a brownish cake rather than a sumptuous red velvet cake. But, I thought the flavors would work well together! Silly me.
- The balls are supposed to chill for “several hours”, per the recipe, so I just stuck them in the freezer for one hour.
- This gave me time to watch two whole episodes of “That Mitchell and Webb Look”. Have you seen it? You should see it.
- Once the balls of cake were cooled, I melted a full bag of semi-sweet chocolate chips in the microwave. Now, if I were a Fancy Lady, I would have used chocolate bark or special melting chocolate. I didn’t, I used regular chocolate chips.
- What this means, practically, is that the chocolate goes on quite thick. Much like my wit.
- I actually had rolled the cake bits too big, so I made them a bit smaller.
- Once the cake bits were all nicely enrobed in chocolate, I put them in the freezer to set the chocolate.
- I put a bowl of white chocolate chips into the microwave to melt whatfor to decorate my truffles.
- I left it in too long unattended . . . and they CAUGHT ON FIRE.
- I DIDN’T EVEN KNOW WHITE CHOCOLATE COULD DO THAT.
- I put some of the white chocolate that hadn’t caught on fire into a decorating bag, and piped it over the truffles.
Verdict: These are actually a bit strange. I imagine they would be terrific if made with real, honest-to-goodness cake, and not this leaden gluten-free shenanigans. The texture is a bit strange– it’s not soft chocolate with chewy inside, like most truffles, it’s soft chocolate leading to soft cake. It’s a bit . . . odd. But not bad.
Huzzah! Not Bad. It’s better than a sharp stick in the eye.